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Birds Aren’t Real Tee – Government Drone Awareness Unit
Birds Aren’t Real Tee – Government Drone Awareness Unit
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Wake up, sheeple.
For too long, we’ve been lied to by Big Avian. The truth is out there — and it’s feathered.
This shirt boldly declares what your cousin Kyle’s been trying to tell you since 2016
Birds aren’t real. They’re surveillance drones with wings.
Soft enough to wear while dodging pigeon cams
No feathers, just facts
Approved by 3 out of 5 conspiracy theorists
Wear it. Spread the word. Trust no sparrow.
Why you need this:
🔍 Publicly question reality with subtle style
🐥 Great for airports, parks, or Thanksgiving
🎤 Perfect conversation starter or ender.
📬 Printed in the U.S.
🕒 Ships in 2–5 Days
🔁 Return or Replace if It Sucks
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Customer Reviews
★★★★★
“Wore this to my niece’s equestrian competition. We haven’t spoken since. 10/10.”
– Derek L.
★★★★★
“Finally a shirt that expresses my deep and totally rational disbelief in horses.”
– Melissa B.
★★★★★
“I was approached by a horse. I put the shirt on. It vanished. Coincidence?”
– Kevin D.
★★★★★
“Got called mentally unwell by a stranger. They’re not wrong, but still.”
– Sam R.
★★★★★
“People keep asking me if it’s political. It’s not. It’s just personal.”
– Jordan W.
★★★★★
“Ordered this shirt as a joke. Now I lead a subreddit with 2,000 members. Stay woke.”
– Claire M.